Sometimes you have to remind the kids about “giving 100%!” Be a little tough on the kids because life will be much tougher! (Notice I didn’t say cruel or mean.) Someday, when the kids are grown, they will appreciate that they can take responsibility for themselves, and society will appreciate that it doesn’t have to!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
Happy September 1st everyone! I just returned from vacation down in the Outer Banks of North Carolina and we all had a great time! While I was there, forcing myself NOT to work, I had some thoughts about parenting. My mother in law made the comment, “I love how affectionate your kids are, and how much they obviously love you and love being around you!” It was a lovely comment and made me feel proud of the hard work that we have done to raise the kids the right. Yes, hard work…. let’s get serious, parenting is NOT easy! It’s not supposed to be easy. When you give your entire heart, and a literal piece of yourself to someone else, you will eventually get hurt, yet we love our kids unconditionally right? Not always!
I have heard many people stating that they “hate” their kids or step kids, and my opinion on this might surprise you. Hating your kids does NOT make you a bad parent. However, doing NOTHING about hating your kids does! Now I am not talking about the normal feelings of frustration that come from being a parent, I am talking about straight up hate. The kind of hate that makes a person go on Facebook to berate, belittle, and bash their own kids. There is something wrong with that. There is nothing wrong with venting, but there is everything wrong with launching a public tirade against those who should be able to trust you to protect them and their innocence.
If you hate your kids, you CAN like them again but it will take EFFORT on your part! YOU have to be the one to make changes, the kids won’t do it. The kids will not actively go to the book store and look up books about family happiness. They will simply turn away from the family, and look for something or something to replace what they are lacking. They will find it, in drugs, promiscuity, gangs, bad choices, and bad behavior. Sure, SOME kids will end up being “OK,” but are you willing to leave your kids future to chance? You want them to visit with grand-babies when they are adults, not excommunicate themselves from you.
Pick up a book, join a parenting group, take some classes, enroll in a workshop, and do whatever it takes to learn how to like your kids again! I personally offer several options like coaching, and my You’re Not My Real Mom eCourse as well. There are countless options for learning how to build better bonds with your children.
Thad and I have personally taken in several children who needed help and support. Not one of those kids are “bad” kids. They just needed support, empathy, and someone with a desire to LEARN how to help them. Each child had different needs, but the common need they ALL had was for love. It’s easier when you know how to do it. Commit to learning how to be a kick ass parent. Spend as much time learning as you can…. there are NO limitations to how much you can learn! You will be amazed how EASY it can be to turn your family life around when you learn and apply new techniques.
So today, please reach out to me, or check out my parenting support if you need help in your family! YOU are the change your family needs!
Please feel free to leave a comment with YOUR thoughts about today’s post!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
My “Mom’s Musings” message to the kids today!
Wishes are great, but sitting on your butt waiting for a magic genie to deliver wishes is the biggest way to feel disappointed by your own life! If you want something, go out there and get it! YOU create your own life with your thoughts, attitudes, beliefs, and ACTIONS! Don’t just make a wish, take inspired action to make your dreams come true and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
ORDER HERE: YOU’RE NOT MY REAL MOM!
Getting divorced? Getting re-married? Or maybe you are already a “step” family and you are ready to throw it all away because your family is not functioning well? HELP HAS ARRIVED!!! I just released my new program: You’re Not My Real Mom; Proven strategies for the success of your blended family and it is awesome!
Your eCourse will contain an eBook with bonus videos, homework and success strategies to get your family on track. Go at your own pace!
You will also have access to our secret support group on facebook. Look at what people are already saying about this ONE OF A KIND course:
“You’re Not My Real Mom” is truly a must buy if you are in ANY kind of family! I don’t know of any other program out there that can cover issues like she does…it’s as if she knows your family’s issues personally. Not only is it helpful and full of really practical information, but Heather’s teaching style is fun and makes it easy to learn! I will recommend this program to any of my friends who decide to get remarried so they can have the best possible start to creating a happy, healthy, step family!” -Heather Westover-Petruzzi; NY
“Heather was my coach before I started the course so I already knew it would be good before I started. Although not everything was directly relevant to me now (as am just post divorce) I found it useful getting an overview of situations and how to handle them before I find myself in that position. A large portion of the info was very relevant regardless of marital situation though – thanks again Heather!” -TM; Israel
“The most important thing I learned is to communicate with your children and spouse, and spouses children to help the kids through any transition and so you and your spouse have the same idea when it comes to each other’s kids.” -MR; PA
Do not wait another moment before getting your family back on track! Your family CAN be happy, healthy, and functional… no matter what type of family you are! Check out the new course… you will be very HAPPY that you did!
ORDER HERE: YOU’RE NOT MY REAL MOM!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
Recently a Facebook fan made a remark about my “perfect life,” and how easy it would be to be happy and inspired if they had such a perfect life too. Really? Me? Perfect life? Not so much! So I took this picture to show you how I am feeling today in particular. I have a summer cold. I have no make up on. My hair is frizzy. And today, I am fighting the urge to just go back to bed!
It is absolutely true that on Facebook, I post only positively motivated posts. I don’t like to share anything negative because I believe in the Law of Attraction which teaches us that what we put out into the world is what we get back. So yes, I am very careful about posting anything negative but that doesn’t mean that I am 100% positive and happy at all times. Far from it in fact, I get pissed off, irritated, and down right cranky sometimes…. BUT I refuse to LIVE there! I refuse to spend too much time in any one negative emotion such as sadness, anger, self-doubt or fear. When I have these feelings, I allow myself to feel them, work out WHY I am feeling them, process through the feeling, then let it go. If I wanted to hold onto it, I would refuse to acknowledge how I really feel, never figure out the real reason for feeling that way, and then post all over Facebook about how crappy I felt. Then, I could commiserate with tons of people who also wallow in self-pity! But that is just not my style!
So instead, I only post happy thoughts, positive posts, and I do my best to inspire others. No, I won’t complain about the huge pile of dirty laundry in my room, or the cranky teenager that was just snarky to me, or trying to figure out how to manage the schedules for 6+ people all summer, or the non stop driving for Mom’s Taxi service because none of my kids have drivers licenses yet, and no, I won’t even complain about the never-ending projects involved in getting our new home renovated. But know this…. just because I don’t complain about things doesn’t mean my life is perfect. It does however mean that I will continue to choose to focus on what I am grateful for, and for the fact that I woke up today!
I don’t live my life in ball gowns and glass slippers. I live my life one moment at a time, doing the best I can, and making the most of it! I am grateful for magic moments, date nights, and laughs. I am also grateful for the hardships because it gives me the opportunity to be resilient, and to appreciate the good times! So please, don’t ever think that my life is perfect…. my life is just like yours. In fact, don’t think anyone else has a perfect life… life isn’t about being perfect. It’s about connecting with others, being happy, and loving.
It’s all in what you choose to focus on, and devote your time to. Give your time to things that make you feel good, focus on the positive, get through the negative and move past it, and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!