“Hey Heather,
My parents and friends don’t like my boyfriend. They supported me when we broke up but I wish they could be equally supportive now that we are back together. He really is a great guy and it was my fault that we broke up; but, my friends blame him for cheating when he actually didn’t. I was really pissed that he was talking to this one girl I can’t stand. He was not cheating at all, but my friends and parents won’t believe me now. How can I convince them that he is the man I love and that they need to be supportive because he is the man I am going to be with?” -Young, in love, and unsupported
Dear Young, in love, and unsupported, Oops… I meant to say: Dear Liar,
I hear this often from people who are addicted to drama. They spend their entire relationship “relating” their business to anyone who will listen rather than focusing on giving to their partner and building a loving relationship. Your friends and family are not light switches. They cannot turn their “like” on and off. You lied so well about your boyfriend that you convinced everyone he was bad. Now you are feeling “unsupported” because they won’t buy into the new version of your story? How supported do you think this poor guy feels? He is dating a girl who talks badly about him, accuses him of doing things he hasn’t done, and then expects to control the feelings of others with her lies. My dear, you don’t need support, you need to stop lying and creating drama! If he is such a great guy, people will see that. But you best beware… if he is such a great guy, HE will also see who YOU are. Never lie about your relationship to “get people on your side” because lies always have a way of coming around to bite you. If you really want this relationship to have a prayer, start by fessing up to your lies, cut the drama, and start focusing on being a good girlfriend. BE the type of person you would want to be in a relationship with, and stop trying to control other people.
Sorry to be so harsh my dear, but I guarantee if you follow my advice, you will see ALL of your relationships start to improve! You are worthy of love and happiness, but you will never find it in deception. Open your heart and be vulnerable, and trust people to love you for who you are, without trying to manipulate or control them, and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
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Monica Chappell
May 30, 2014
Amen! It sucks when someone you love makes you out to be a monster with lies and/or not giving the whole story.
Deborra Harney-Gregor
May 30, 2014
Oh that was good!!
Donna
June 1, 2014
Great job Heather! Someone had to tell her the truth! Hopefully now this little drama queen will keep it real!