“Hey Heather,
Why are all boys in my grade such jerks? I really like XXXXXX and he said he liked me too, but he acts like he doesn’t like me when he is with his friends. I really want to have a boyfriend and I am mature and stuff, but I don’t think boys are.” -8th grader
Dear Mature and stuff,
You are in 8th grade. Nobody in 8th grade is mature enough for a “relationship” and that is a GOOD thing! Look at the adults around you… most of them are not even mature enough for a relationship! Many adults now are struggling, divorcing, cheating, lying, fighting, or living like roommates! This is because they never learned HOW to have a successful relationship! Schools don’t teach people how to communicate without hurting the other person, or how to meet the needs of your partner unconditionally, or even how to work through conflict. In other words, schools do not teach people how to have successful, happy, and healthy romantic relationships.
It is completely natural for you to want a boyfriend, but you my dear are in an excellent position to have something FAR better! Start learning HOW to be successful at relationships now, so you will be ready for a real relationship later! At your age, boys come and go, crushes happen often, and you will fall in love many times. That is part of the excitement of growing up. Just remember, now is not the time to focus on finding “Mr. Right.” It IS the time to giggle, have fun, hang out with BFF’s, take lots of selfies, talk about boys, drool over your favorite singer, dream of mansions and limousines, plan summer fun, spend time with your family, paint your nails, climb a tree, read a good book, watch a scary movie…. and a million other age appropriate fun things! I once read this saying; “High school is where you meet your bridesmaids, not your husband!” I like that a lot!
I hope you will take it upon yourself to become the relationship guru of your age group! There are plenty of books about relationships, (mine included,) there are youtube videos, and there are tons of blogs… all dedicated to teaching people how to have successful relationships. (Read the hundreds of blog posts right here: http://liveinspirednow.com/category/relationships/ ) You are not too young to learn, grow, and share your knowledge and someday, many years from now, some awesome guy will be grateful to be your boyfriend! Don’t miss out on him because you settled too soon for a “jerk.” Step into your own greatness, appreciate who you are right now, observe good and bad relationships, learn all you can, and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
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