Do you have dreams, ambitions, goals or purpose? Do you think about them daily? Do you obsess about what it will be like when you accomplish your dream? Do you get excited each day to work toward your purpose? Don’t ever give up the dream you have! People will always try to get you to quit and give up but don’t listen! People say it’s “impossible” but that is only because they don’t want to make the effort themselves! NEVER, EVER use other peoples limitations as YOUR excuse to give up on something that is important to you! Nobody can force you to give up, just ignore, avoid or delete anyone that discourages you and do your thing! Don’t give up, keep striving toward your dreams and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
Recently someone asked me to write a post about “losing power.” I replied that you can’t “lose” power but you can give it away! Nobody can lose their power, nobody has to be controlled by another person and what another person thinks, does or says… even if they think or say it about you! One thing I learned long ago is that when you do good things, when you live a positive life and dedicate your entire life to helping and serving…. some people STILL won’t like you. If I sat around feeling bad about the things I don’t control, I would spend my entire life feeling bad and what a waste that would be! You can never control what other people say, think, feel or do but you can control YOU and how you react to others. Do you really want to give your power to someone who doesn’t like you? Do you want that person to have such easy access to how you feel? Tell your ego to let it go! Ignore rude comments, avoid negative or hurtful people, distance yourself from family that doesn’t care about your best interest. If you spend your days angry, your world isn’t out of control… YOU are! Relax, let go of EVERYTHING that you have no control over (which is everything but your own thoughts and feelings,) don’t give away your power and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
Isn’t it time to give up on feeling bad? How long do you want to do this for? So many people sit around thinking about all the injustices that have occurred and how they were the victim in one way or another. So much so, that they miss the gift of the present moment. We have all fallen victim to some hardship before, what makes yours so special that you should use it as your reason for stagnation? It is time to let go and free yourself of past pain. People hold onto pain like a security blanket, well it’s not; it is your burial wrap! When you are thinking about what he did to you or why did you allow abuse, or if only I had…. you miss the beautiful baby’s smile, the kind stranger who held the door, the gorgeous sunset, the sound of the birds, the calm and stillness of a cool night, the warm glow of the fire, the tender moments between lovers and a million other opportunities to choose happiness.
Get PISSED off at destructive thoughts, yell and scream at them, tell them NO MORE, decide to be in a better place rather than falling into old patterns! When you start to think of past hurts, ground yourself… take a mental inventory of all the material things surrounding you. EX: I am safe in my car, I have my water bottle, my hat is on my head, my purse is right next to me and I am driving home. Take in the present moment by noticing your reality…. you are NOT walking in to catch your X boyfriend kissing another girl. Then, take deep breathes and remind yourself of the time and date. EX: Today is Monday, January 14 2013, I am healthy, free and have every opportunity for happiness. Finally, create a new memory! If you are driving, crank up some happy music or pull over, get out, stretch and take in the view! If you are at work, take a quick walking break and get some air or go and hug someone who needs it. I cannot stress enough how focusing on helping someone else is the BEST medicine for mental health!
So today, live in the INSPIRED now by being present in each moment and creating new positive memories for the future and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
I recently bumped into a young person that I worked with a couple of years ago. When I worked with him, he was a bright young man with a huge heart and a tremendous amount of potential. At the time, he had a knack for getting himself into trouble but was nonetheless a good kid.
He sent me a message after we bumped into one another and thanked me for having a huge impact on his life and asked me to “write about how u delt with me in school and how on my worst days you always made it better for me.” I thought that was really sweet and so this post is for him!
The way I used to “deal” with him was by always being consistent and never enabling. I treat kids with compassion but I am completely honest with them and help them see reality. I will not do things for them that they can do for themselves. I also don’t believe in sugar coating things just because they are kids. They don’t live in a pretend world, they live in the same reality that has drugs, disease, crime and an overwhelming amount of temptation that glorifies bad choices. When I work with young people, I want to help them prepare for whatever they will face and pretending bad things don’t exist will never help them make good choices. When a kid does make a bad choice, it is imperative to let them face the consequences. Allow them to “suffer” through the choices that they have made, even if it involves paying money, community service, a painful breakup, rehab or even jail time. It is essential to their learning and developing a sense of responsibility. You can still be there for them and let them know that you support them when they are working toward recovery or rebuilding their life but will not enable them by rescuing them from consequences or by diminishing what they have done. (On a side note, hugs, smiles and encouragement go a long way. Many kids tell me that I am more like their Mom… or what they thought a Mom should really be like.)
I tell all the kids I work with that I will always be there for them and support them through all the struggles but I will also say what they need to hear especially when it’s harsh. I encourage you all to say what is difficult… it might not always be listened to immediately but it will be a planted seed and sometimes it might just save a life! (I have worked with suicidal teens too.) Sometimes you have to walk away from a person (young or not) that is continuing to make bad or destructive choices. You can let them know that you will be there when they are done hurting themselves and others and walk away. (Nobody should ever put up with abuse, not even from a child.)
There is nothing in life more rewarding than having a young person come to you and tell you that you helped them! I am forever touched by all these young people I am lucky enough to “deal” with. Some have amazing success stories, some are still a work in progress and I am blessed to be a part of it. Think about the difference you could make in a young persons life and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
I read the book Kids Are Worth It by Barbara Coloroso about 18 years ago and it shaped who I became as a parent. The book basically states that there are 3 types of parents: brickwall, jellyfish and backbone parents. Here are those profiles:
BRICK-WALL: rigid, unyielding, strict rules, highly conditional, obedience expected, order, punctuality, cleanliness, punishment, humiliation, threats, ignored feelings, competition, fear, needs not acknowledged, they do things for the kids rather than letting them learn through trial.
JELLYFISH: loose or no rules, no follow through, unknown or not applied consequences, chaos, chaotic emotions, put downs, humiliation, no structure, threats, bribes, giving up, oblivious to needs, kids easily influenced by peers, they allow the kids to have lower standards for themselves.
BACKBONE: unconditional love and caring, acknowledging kids needs, letting them know they are important, smiles, hugs, HUMOR, motivation (you can do it!), simple clear rules, natural and or reasonable consequences, encouragement, encouraging self awareness and personal growth, allow mastery.
The jellyfish parent sometimes seems like a brickwall because when things seem very out of control they resort to rigidity but when that doesn’t work they just give up. The brickwall parent doesn’t allow children to think, they teach them to respond rather than think and learn to do things; this type of parent stifles creativity. Obviously we all want to strive to be the backbone parent which allows kids the freedom to be creative and expressive yet within boundaries that will keep them safe.
So today, discover what type of parent you are and see if you want to make some changes, check out Kids Are Worth It and Live Inspired Now!
PS: I would love to hear from you if you or your child needs coaching for a challenge that you are facing. Kids LOVE having a coach… just read my testimonials!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
