Have you ever been so fed up with something that you just had to walk away? Last night I chose to quit a “professional” group that I belonged to.
For months, I have been dreading going to the meetings because there was so much tension between some of the members and I didn’t want to be in a stressful environment. I continued to go however, because most of the members are great people and I really enjoyed seeing them. The tension continued to escalate and recently it turned into a full-fledged drama!
I took a step back and asked myself these questions:
Is being part of this group serving me, my family, or my business?
Is being part of this group helping me grow as a person?
Is being part of this group making me happy?
The answer to ALL 3 questions was an emphatic “no, not any more!” I had joined the group to network with like-minded professionals, and to have fun, but this was no longer the case. It was hard for me to walk away because I felt like I was walking away from some people who I cared about, but I spoke with them privately and explained why I could no longer stay and they completely understood.
So at last nights meeting, amid a hostile conversation between a couple of members in dispute, I raised my hand to take my turn to speak. When it was my time, I went to the front of the room and stood in front of the entire group and said something akin to this:
“I quit. I can no longer be part of a group that participates in drama, and the discouragement of its members. I love the relationships that I have developed in this group and I will continue to maintain those relationships outside of this club. I will not have my name associated with an organization that I feel does not have at least the same level of integrity that I try to have for myself.”
Whoa! You have no idea how impossible that would have been for me to say a few years ago when I was more concerned with people liking me than doing what was right for myself. I used to be so paralyzed with the fear of people being mad or disappointed with me and it kept me in relationships that were toxic for far too long. I felt very empowered! Thank goodness that I found MY voice and can self advocate now!
I share this with the hopes of inspiring YOU to find your voice and to be brave enough to walk away from people or places that don’t serve you, help you grow, or make you happy. Life is too short to lose yourself to the drama or meanness of other people. Find your voice, walk away if you need to, and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
The next time you say “I have to” do something, replace it with “I get to!” It instantly turns a complaint into gratitude! “I have to work” becomes a statement of gratitude when you say “I get to work.” It puts things into perspective when you realize that you get to do things that some people WISH they could do!
What do you “get to do” today?
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
Tired of the “ups and downs” in your relationship? Are you constantly out of balance? Does he threaten to leave while you beg “no-no-no” because you know you are going to fall hard? Or maybe you are wishing to get off the seesaw but you don’t want to drop him? It’s a vicious cycle until you decide to get OFF the ride and make changes in your relationship!
The first thing you need to do is communicate well. Talking isn’t enough. You have to know how to speak so your partner will really listen to what you have to say. Yelling, sarcasm, passive-aggressive, and ignoring are not forms of effective communication, they are however a great way to make your partner feel “unheard.”
The second thing you need is a purpose. All great relationships know what they are working toward. Unfortunately, most people just get together because “it feels good.” Well the feelings of “love” are not enough. You also need trust, respect, dedication, integrity, and a clear purpose.
The third thing you need is a plan for tough times. Nobody ever thinks they will have problems, or even break up, so they never have a plan in place for when things go to hell in a hand-basket! Life happens and if you expect it to always be perfect, you are setting yourself up for failure. Have some discussions about what to do in the event of an emergency, or who will make the final decision when you can’t agree on something. (My YOU’RE NOT MY REAL MOM! program has a family checklist that puts it all on paper so you can discuss and decide who is in charge of what. This program is really beneficial for ANY type of family!)
And lastly, you need someone to help you through all of this! If you are having challenges in your relationship and you want to try something that actually works, give me a call! Don’t spend years in couples counseling… it doesn’t work. I will teach you the tools to communicate effectively, help you find a purpose or create a family mission statement, and show you how to plan for the unexpected! I will also teach you how to feel like kids again without the games! You can have passion and excitement just like when you first fell in love! The only requirement is that you WANT to make changes. So get off the seesaw, contact me today, fix your relationship, and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris heather@liveinspirednow.com
1-607-269-7815
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
It’s unfortunate that we ever have to break bad news to children, but when we do, it’s important to do it in a way that is gentle and won’t harm children. Please watch today’s video with tips that will help you break bad news in a way that is supportive and will help kids process through in the healthiest way possible. I speak specifically about breaking news of loss, but these tips apply when it comes to speaking to them about divorce, death, loss, tragedy, natural disasters, or whatever unfortunate event has occurred in their life. Please share this with anyone who needs it, and Live Inspired Now!
Here is the direct youtube link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8VWg39–Gew
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
You can’t over-communicate. ALMOST ALL PROBLEMS WITHIN RELATIONSHIPS ARE DUE TO LACK OF, OR INEFFECTUAL COMMUNICATION. If you are afraid to talk about it, then you HAVE TO.
Everyone thinks they know how to communicate. You just open your mouth and talk right? NO, it requires far more than that. For example, sarcasm, yelling, belittling, accusing, passive-aggressive, omission, shaming, blaming, and guilting, are all forms of communication that are not helpful!
There are far better ways to communicate your message so that people will hear, respond, and appreciate what you have to say…. even your teenagers!!! I would love to help you learn to communicate in a more effective way! From sparking confidence speaking to your boss, to getting your spouse to truly hear and respond to what you have to say…. it is EASY once you have the right tools! Contact me today, learn to communicate your way to success, and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!