Are you willing to read on to learn how to get your spouse, kids, friends, or clients to say YES more often?
It’s very simple, let me show you how….
From now on, instead of telling, or even asking someone to do something, ask them if they are “willing.”
For example:
“Hey kiddo, are you willing to do the dishes so I can start dinner?”
“Hey Babe, are you willing to take out the trash for me so I don’t get my hair wet in the rain?”
“Hey readers, are you willing to read on…….” (See what I did there with that one? lol)
Commands, or questions that are disguised as commands often don’t work AND they put strain on your relationships.
When you ask someone if they “are willing” then you give them a choice in how they decide to act as a person.
It takes the focus OFF of the task, and puts it on the persons willingness to help and it’s FAR more effective in getting a YES! You might even get an enthusiastic HELL YES!
Are you willing to share this with someone who might be struggling? Just share this page with them!
What are YOUR thoughts on this? Leave your comments below! I LOVE your feedback!
With love, gratitude, and inspiration,
Heather Paris
607-269-7815
www.liveinspirednow.com
Email me: heather@liveinspirednow.com
Follow me on YouTube, Instagram (@heatherparis) and Facebook!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
Let me start by saying I hate that I even have to talk about this but the fact is:
- porn is pervasive in our world
- our kids are vulnerable
- it’s exceptionally damaging
- tons of parent’s ask me about it.
So let’s discuss some ways to keep our kids safe!
Yes, even YOUR kid can be exposed to porn. I don’t care what religion you are, how secure your internet is, or how much you’ve “protected” them…. it’s everywhere and no kid is 100% safe.
Thad and I will be doing a brief Facebook live talk on this subject tonight, January 29th, at 9pm so please join us then. My Facebook address: https://www.facebook.com/heatherloveslife
In the meantime, here are a few strategies to protect your babies!
For younger kids:
1 Have “the talk!”
If you don’t talk to your kids about sex, someone else will and it may not align with your own values or beliefs. In addition, they may just get information that is completely inaccurate…. for example: “You can’t get pregnant the first time you do it.”
2 Have “the talk” EARLY!
No age is too young to discuss intimacy and sex. Obviously you need to use age appropriate language and the earlier the better because it makes porn less alluring. You had to talk about peeing and pooping in the potty, don’t clam up about sex!
3 Use appropriate body part names!
It’s a vagina and a penis. Not a hoohaw, peepee, or private parts. Use the real names as they are real body parts just like the nose, arm, and knee. The more evasive you are with your language, the more you unconsciously drive home that their parts are embarrassing and the less likely they are to have open talks with you.
4 Tell kids WHO gets access to their genitals!
Make sure they know that only Mommy and Daddy or the Doctor when Mommy or Daddy are with them, get access to their genitals. Tell them what touching is OK too… wiping after the bathroom, changing diapers, or checking for a rash etc.
For older kids:
1 Everything on the list above if you haven’t done it. Better late than never…
2 Family zone!
Keep computers in the family room. Don’t allow laptops or computers in children’s bedrooms. Kids should be in a public area when using the internet.
3 History tells all!
Check the history on your computer often. I’m no computer whiz but there must be some software that blocks certain sites, or can help monitor what sites are visited on the family computer. Thad handles that stuff in our home but if you don’t have a “Thad” then a quick google search should give you plenty of computer safety options.
4 Sexual feelings are normal, not bad.
Please let your kids know that their sexual urges and desires are totally normal. They are not “bad” for wanting sex, they are human. Never demonize your child. Just discuss with them appropriate ways to deal with their sexual urges. Yes, this is a wicked awkward conversation but open and honest communication is the most effective antidote to destructive decisions.
5 If you catch them, don’t lose your shit.
Seriously, if you pick up your laptop and find they have been searching and or watching porn, put the laptop down, take a few nice deep breaths, and come up with your talking points. Screaming, grounding, ignoring, or punishing your kiddo is a missed learning opportunity. Again, their desires are completely normal and they need to learn that porn is NOT the way to deal with their own biology.
6 Sex can be funny.
A little laughter goes a long way. Not every conversation with your child has to be a lecture, or deadly serious. Over-dramatizing a situation is a great way to make it even more attractive; lighten the mood with a little levity.
7 Allow your kids to do something “bad.”
Letting your kids get away with a few things that they think are “bad” is a great way to help them express themselves in a safer way. For example, let your kid dye their hair pink, or skip a day of school to go shopping with you, or let them have a friend over on a school night. Be sure to pretend that you HATE the idea and that they are “winning” one over on you. Kids need to rebel, it’s part of childhood. Allow them to rebel in safe ways rather than by doing things that are very harmful such as watching porn, or having sex too early.
8 Be the hang out house!
You get to be the cool mom or dad that allows everyone to hang out in your house. It’s easier to monitor what your kids are doing if they are at your home. You can’t watch them at their friends house and their friends may have a laptop and web cam in their locked bedroom. Yikes!
We offer more tips HERE on you youtube: https://youtu.be/gjQWiAtmslo
Be sure to tune in and feel free to message me with specific questions that you have before we go live. I’ll try to answer all questions (anonymously of course.)
There are no guarantees that you can completely protect your children at all times, but you can increase your odds by being proactive and active when it comes to their safety.
Watch the youtube video and get more tips at: https://youtu.be/gjQWiAtmslo
Please share this message if you know someone that may benefit. Thanks!
What are YOUR thoughts on this? Comment below!
With love, gratitude, and inspiration,
Heather Paris
607-269-7815
www.liveinspirednow.com
Email me: heather@liveinspirednow.com
Follow me on YouTube, Instagram (@heatherparis) and Facebook!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
The words that make me want to cry…. “I suffer from…”
Sally was having a bad day and boldly proclaimed on Facebook that she was “suffering from depression.” She went into all the reasons why her life was terrible, how she had no friends, and how broke she was financially.
Sally became super defensive whenever anyone tried to give her some advice, uplifting words, or encouragement. Sally wanted to suffer and nobody was going to deny her that.
I’m not saying depression isn’t real. I am however saying that suffering is optional and that you should never utter the words, “I suffer from” again!
Don’t take ownership of suffering. At the very least say “I am experiencing _______ right now.”
I live by the phrase “this too shall pass” and even if it’s something that absolutely will not pass, I “live” with it, not “suffer” from it.
You can live with far more than you can suffer from.
Your words have exceptional power over your feelings, don’t “suffer” when you don’t have to! Hardships, heartbreak, and sadness come with living, don’t add suffering to life as well.
What are YOUR thoughts on this? Comment below…
With love, gratitude, and inspiration,
Heather Paris
607-269-7815
www.liveinspirednow.com
Email me: heather@liveinspirednow.com
Follow me on YouTube, Instagram (@heatherparis) and Facebook!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
Amanda came to me after experiencing a trauma.
She tells us in this video that she was VERY close to “earning a criminal record” because she was about to lose her shit on someone!
We’ve ALL been there! I know I have… many times!
Watch today’s video and learn what helped Amanda!
Use the comments below to tell me about the last time you almost lost your shit and how you handled it…..
With love, gratitude, and inspiration,
Heather Paris
607-269-7815
www.liveinspirednow.com
Email me: heather@liveinspirednow.com
Follow me on YouTube, Instagram (@heatherparis) and Facebook!
SPEAKING OF NOT “LOSING YOUR SHIT”…..
Become a certified life coach and learn the strategies to help others as they make the changes they need to live happier, healthier lives.
You’ll learn:
- How to handle trauma
- How to have a rock solid relationship
- How to help without enabling
- How to say no without feeling horrible
- How to serve clients with a 100% success rate
- The skills to repair broken marriages
- How to make money and grow a coaching practice
- ….and SO much more!!
This program is very robust and I’ll walk you through the entire thing with free coaching for 12 months included in the training!!!
Not only does it feel exceptional to help people, but you get paid, and can work from anywhere in the world!
The Live Inspired Now Coach Training is now open for enrollment but space is limited!
For more information, please hit reply to this email, or visit www.liveinspirednowcoaching.com!
You can reach out to Amanda at:
Amanda Funk
(607) 423-5036
www.passionintoprofits.help
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
“Sally” was in tears after catching her husband having sex with another woman… again.
And not even an hour later he was professing his undying love to her. He made her feel guilty for wanting to leave him. He made her feel hopeful when he promised to make up for his indiscretions. He made her scared when he said he couldn’t live without her.
She called me because she wanted to know what SHE could do to help HIM.
Abusers will exploit your emotions to get their way. They will use every bit of vulnerability you have to use, abuse, and hurt you. Then they will employ you to help them rather than taking any personal responsibility for helping themselves!
Emotions are wonderful but if you are overly emotional, you are exploitable!
In today’s world, it’s so popular and acceptable to say “follow your heart” and I’m warning you that your heart is not equipt to make all of your decisions for you!
Your heart only wants to love so it doesn’t make decisions regarding safety or higher purpose.
A mechanic can fix your car but you wouldn’t ask him to do your laundry too.
If you are highly in tune to your heart and your emotions, it’s time to get in touch with your head and your higher self too!
The next time your in a situation that makes you feel scared, lonely, or guilty, ask yourself these questions:
- Is this a one time incident or a pattern?
- Is this something I wish to experience again?
- Is this something I’d wish for my kids / parent / close friend to experience?
- Do I walk on eggshells?
- Am I safe enough to talk about this?
- Do I make excuses for their behavior?
Emotional exploitation is not OK but there is something you can do about it! Listen to your head and your higher self, not just your heart!
Your head is smart, it runs on logic, assesses risks, and makes rational decisions.
Your higher self is your inner light, your God-ness, your soul. It makes decisions for the greater good and for the betterment of self, family, and humanity.
You have all that you need to be happy, healthy, and peaceful but if you need help, reach out!
If you are unsure if you are in a toxic relationship, please reach out. I am more than happy to set up a free call to help!
With love, gratitude, and inspiration,
Heather Paris
607-269-7815
www.liveinspirednow.com
Email me: heather@liveinspirednow.com
Follow me on YouTube, Instagram (@heatherparis) and Facebook!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!