How many days of your life would have been way more awesome if you woke up in the morning and decided that it was going to be an amazingly fantastic day? People get into the habit of downplaying life, or settling for mediocrity. Today, when someone asks “How are you?” Instead of the automatic “fine” response, come up with something more compelling! Try responding with an “I am freakin’ awesome!” See what type of response you get from that and notice how you start to feel when you use more passionate terms.
The best years of your life are NOW if you let them be. Someone recently told me that they were just trying to make it through the next 4 years until they could retire. You don’t have to “wait” to enjoy life! Even if you are working a job you don’t like, or some other aspect of your life is not perfect, that doesn’t mean the rest of your life has to suck too! Get out there and live! Take a risk. Do something fun. Enjoy the little things. Be grateful for what you already have! How unfortunate would it be to “get through” those 4 years, only to retire and realize that you miss what you were doing. Or to still feel underwhelmed? Nobody ever has to wait for happiness, they just have to choose it!
Stop blaming your circumstances for what YOU are not accomplishing. Go out there and get what you want! Stop whining, start living, start using more passionate language and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
Let your inner light be so bright that not only does it guide you, but it illuminates the way for others as well! One of our greatest gifts is to share our light, love, and passion with the world. Share your passion, light the way for others, and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
When babies are small they cry and whine to get what they want. As they grow older and begin to speak, we teach them to “use their words” to get what they want. Crying, whining, or hitting and kicking are obviously discouraged and they are reminded to use their words. This “use their words” milestone usually occurs between the ages of 1-5 depending upon the child’s progression.
After they have learned to “use their words,” most kids never receive further instruction. They are rarely encouraged, after that first milestone, to develop further by being taught to “use appropriate words.” They are never told to use “kind words, feeling words” or other types of deeper, more meaningful communication.
It never ceases to amaze me how many adult couples tell me that they called one another mean and hurtful names in the middle of a fight because they never learned to effectively communicate. How many relationships would have been saved had they learned to say “I am very angry right now and I need to talk about how I am feeling” as opposed to saying “You’re a jerk, I hate you, and you never listen to me!”
Learn to use your words effectively and let your actions back them up! Then, teach your children to speak effectively too. After they have learned to use their works, teach them to use BETTER words! Teach them to speak kindly to others. Teach them to use feeling words such as; “I feel angry, I feel confused, I feel sad.” Then take it a step further to teach them to use words that express their desires such as; “I would like to talk to you, I think I need to take a walk, I would love to share with you.”
One of the best gifts you could ever give your child is to teach them to communicate well. It will help them in school, at work, in their relationships, and it will give them confidence because they will be able to self advocate! We all need to be able to express our feelings, thoughts, needs, desires, wishes, hopes, emotions, and our dreams! “Using your words” is just not enough if you are over the age of 5. Learn to use BETTER words, improve your life and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
I took my toy poodle, Lucy, to puppy kindergarten many years ago when she was a curious young puppy. The trainer worked with each of us “Dog Mommies” and taught us to focus on our pup’s strengths, not to compare our dog’s abilities to other dogs, and to continuously praise their efforts! She also let us know that not all the pups were destined for distinction at the fancy dog shows and that was OK. Some dogs would make great farm helpers, some would be wonderful service animals, and some would just be really sweet companions!
The tennis balls the instructor provided during the course were larger than Lucy’s tiny little head. As you can imagine, this made learning how to “fetch” rather difficult. Instead of insisting that she learn how to retrieve the ball, we focused on her incredible “dancing” skills; Lucy had a natural inclination to walk on her hind legs. The instructor showed me how to turn this seemingly useless behavior into a “dance” that she could perform on command. Her dancing often earned her treats or an affectionate pat on the head.
Unfortunately, I was scheduled to be out of town on business and couldn’t make it to the very last class, which was graduation day. I stopped in before I left for my trip to explain the situation to our instructor. I expressed how much I loved the class and how well little Lucy was doing. I thanked them for teaching ME how to teach my dog. Then, I said “I don’t actually think dog training school is for dogs at all, I think it is for the parents!” At that moment, the instructor smiled knowingly and said “You have graduated, let me get you a certificate!”
Today, as I passed a local dog training school, I recalled this great experience of training Lucy all those years ago. Those thoughts led me into thoughts of the training model that the American school system has used for decades. Why aren’t our schools more like dog training schools?
We are constantly pushing kids through a one-size-fits-all educational system that doesn’t recognize student strengths and try’s to convince every single student and parent that college (the fancy dog show) is the only option for success. Schools don’t accommodate different learning styles nor do they encourage independence. There is no curriculum that promotes entrepreneurship, nor are there any courses that teach character development skills, which have been proven to be far more useful in the “real world” than educational knowledge alone.
What if your child is a “golden retriever” but is never encouraged to go fetch things? Maybe your child is an “English Bulldog” being dressed in pink sweaters and forced to perform at the dog show. Or maybe your child is like my Lucy who was too small to fetch the tennis ball but loved to dance as a young puppy (she now prefers to herd the goats on our tiny farm). If we had insisted on teaching her to fetch, we may never have discovered her many other talents.
I think it is time we start teaching to our children’s strengths and abilities. I think we should encourage them to discover areas in which they excel and praise their efforts and accomplishments. We should set them up for success by realizing that not every student is right for college. We should also support trade jobs, life skills, and entrepreneurship as valid options.
Most of all, I think we should expect parents to be involved so the teachers can teach instead of doing double duty as a disciplinarian or social worker. Strong parenting skills are just as important to a child’s educational success as they are to a puppy’s training success. For example, parents should learn that when their child makes a mistake, “rubbing their nose in it” isn’t the most effective course of action. Positive reinforcements are far more effective than emphasizing on your child’s mistakes.
Dog training was amazing for Lucy, for myself, and for my kids, who also attended. It taught us a great deal… much more than it taught Lucy. Lucy never went to the Eukanuba Dog Show, she never did learn to fetch, and she gave up dancing for herding goats but, she is productive, healthy, and happy. Isn’t that really all we want for our children?
Live Inspired Now,
Heather Paris
Inspired Life Coach | Author | Speaker
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
A few quick ways to de-stress:
Live in the present moment…Focus on today, not yesterday
Listen to relaxing music
Drink healthy, aromatic teas; chamomile, green, mint, lemon, etc
Eat healthy food; raw, greens, veggies, healthy supplements, and plenty of water
Laugh; watch funny movies, go to a comedy show, or recall funny memories
Try something new; even if it’s just a new route home, change your routine
Exercise; start with a walk and see where it leads, move your body
Get enough sleep; 6-8 hours is usually sufficient
Focus on positive thoughts; distract yourself if you start to think negatively
Surround yourself with positive people
Take a hot bath and relax
Light candles and create a relaxing setting
Help others; volunteer, mentor or encourage
Journal your thoughts, feelings, and ideas
Take deep breaths
Make peace with difficult tasks and get them over with
Acknowledge and accept your feelings as valid
Meditate
Play with a pet
Have physical contact; hugs, hold hands, or snuggle, etc
Focus on doing one thing at a time; skip the multitasking
Dance
Hold a baby
Use positive, uplifting self talk
Read something uplifting daily; www.liveinspirednow.com
MAKE time to de-stress! Rushing through life will only prevent you from enjoying it. Take time for yourself, stop trying to be everything for everyone. Stress leads to disease and unhappiness so de-stress for your sanity and your health and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
