This past week a young person I know contacted me and asked if I would coach him. I know this young person and know that he has a supportive family so I told him that I was definitely open to it but his parents would have to contact me to set things up. I have worked with a few teens without talking with their parents but ONLY because I knew the parents to be very abusive. I would never turn a child away who needs help despite their family situation. However, if the child has a parent/parents in their lives, then the parent should be consulted and made aware of your interactions. Parents should never be undermined and family should always be highly regarded. If you have a young person in your life that looks up to you, don’t “get in good” with them by insulting or undermining their parents. A family is important to children and again, unless they are being abused, the family should be put first. If a young person confides something in you that could be risky or dangerous to them, the parents should be told immediately. Parents need to be given the opportunity to support and help their kids. Adults should be mature enough to speak with the parents and explain the situation, instead of keeping secrets with the child. It won’t do a child any good for an “adult” that they trust to not make the hard decision to consult the parents. In fact, it will only promote further bad behavior because the “adult secret keeper” is actually validating the bad behavior by keeping the secret.
All kids will make bad decisions at some point, and most kids will assume their parents are going to “kill them,” but that is just not the case. Good parents will give consequences and deal with the problems and will continue to love their kids…. even when they are angry.
So today, if you have a young person in your life that is “telling” you things, encourage them to talk to their parents. If it something risky, let the parents know what is going on. Never undermine a child’s family by talking badly about the kids parents. Put parents and family first, encourage kids, and empower parents by supporting the entire family and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
10 Ways To Build Self-Confidence:
1- Avoid perfectionism. Perfectionism is actually the lowest possible standard one can have because it is unattainable. Nobody is perfect, don’t bother trying. Do your best and then celebrate what you have done. Nobody likes to see you complaining about how imperfect your cupcakes are, especially when they are enough to make Martha Stewart proud! You can self deprecate too much!
2- Dress up and feel great. Wear the outfit that is going to make you feel great! You know… the jeans that make your butt look amazing or the power suit that makes you feel very professional. Whatever it is, put it on and wear it like a cloak of confidence!
3- Smile. Your brain takes cues from your facial expressions and creates emotions to go along with it. Smile and your brain thinks you are happy and at ease. Smile even if you don’t mean it and soon you will mean it! (And a smile is the prettiest accessory you can wear!)
4- Practice makes perfect, you will feel more confident if you know your stuff. Practice, practice and practice some more! Giving a speech… practice in your car every chance you get. Nervous about making phone calls…. practice and role play with friends. Have a friend reject you over and over and get good at laughing about it! Rejection happens sometimes, so what, get past it and move on!
5- Compliment other people and make them feel good. You will have more confidence when you make others feel good. They will also regard you more for being such a nice person!
6- Use your body confidently. Stand up tall, don’t slouch, work out, walk faster, move your hands away from your body and spread your fingers apart. Don’t be clenched up or tighten your muscles, relax and don’t cross your arms. Good body language gives you more confidence and makes you more approachable to other people.
7- Give to others. You can never feel bad if you are doing good for others. You don’t have to give just money, give of your time or resources too. Volunteer, help others, get involved in a cause and find a way to make a difference in others lives. It will make you feel great and help you to become more self actualized as opposed to self focused.
8- Get up front, put yourself in front of others. Sit in the front row, walk to the front of a room, stand where everyone can see you, don’t be afraid to walk up to others. Or even if you are afraid, do it anyway. It is perfectly OK to be nervous, but don’t let the nerves keep you from your networking event, or from seeing your favorite speaker because you hid in the back of the room.
9- Pump yourself up with loud music or positive audio books. I use 80’s rock to get me going but use whatever makes you feel great! (You can’t go wrong with Prince or Guns N Roses… just sayin’.)
10- Get a cheering section. Know who your friends are, let them know what you are doing and ask for their support! Most friends want to see you succeed so ask them to “wish you luck, cross their fingers or cheer you on!” Also, talk about how you are feeling. Let them know that you are nervous and could use their support. Acknowledging your true feelings makes them less powerful and easier to get past! Also, focus on past successes and things you do well, to remind yourself that you know how to be successful and to encourage more confidence!
Build your confidence and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
Today is my first live on air broadcast with my friends Jodi and Joanne. Please check out the 3 Goddesses on Spreecast today at 11:00am by clicking this link: http://www.spreecast.com/events/come-watch-our-first-time#_=
Today we will be talking about “first times” and the fear that keeps us from doing things for the first time. Like the first time you have to speak in public or the first time you get called to the Principal’s office for one of your kids, and even the first time you fall in love! Join me and the other 2 Goddesses, learn to overcome first time jitters, conquer your fears, and have some fun with us! We are all moms, we are all trained Strategic Intervention Coaches, all full of funny stories, and excited to share them with you!
So today, join us at 11:00am (it’s free), have some fun, bring your questions and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
Make a list of your favorites and ask your lover to do the same. Maybe you already know them all but maybe you will be surprised by what you see when you exchange lists. Post your favorites in a prominent place too so your lover can refer to the list if they want to surprise you some time. It will also act like a “vision board” if you keep it where you see it all the time. Stay focused on your favorite things and manifest them into your life! Make your list, check out your partners or your kids, have fun and Live Inspired Now!
Here is MY list of favorites:
Food: Vegetarian Shepard’s Pie
Color: Green
Movie: The Breakfast Club
Destination: Montana
Sweet Treat: Creme Brulee’
Actor: Sylvester Stallone
Actress: Sandra Bullock
Singer: Prince
Band: Guns n Roses
Animal: Penguins
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
The only people we should be saving is ourselves, we need to take responsibility and handle our “shit.” I often see people “play the victim” so they can get attention or because they don’t want to invest their own time into solving a problem so they look to someone else to “rescue” them. You don’t need rescuing, you need empowerment! Put on your big girl panties and tiara and take care of your business! It is great to get help when you truly need it but to constantly rely on others to take care of you is a disservice to yourself. Let this become your mantra: “I can handle it!” There is nothing YOU can’t handle….. just stop telling yourself that you can’t. You are Queens (and Kings) and can take on anything! When you are confident and strong and take care of yourself, you attract others like that too. You can always find someone to take care of you, but that will not be a high quality relationship. Build a strong connection by being someone who can also take care of their partner when necessary. A successful relationship means that you each put the others needs first. A person who only gives will eventually get sick of giving all the time and a taker will eventually get bored with the giver. Be someone who is happy alone but loves being together. Be strong, be confident, be loving and kind, empower yourself and build strong, healthy relationships, proudly wear your tiara and Live Inspired Now!
Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!
