3 different clients made me say these words this week:
“You are NOT the mood police!”
This is one of the most prevalent challenges in our society today…. we feel the need to correct or fix the feelings of other people because we feel their bad mood is a reflection of us as a person.
- Husband is in a cranky mood.
- Wife is irritated by husband’s cranky mood so she tries to make him feel happy.
- Husband doesn’t want to feel happy right now. He wants to be left alone to think for a bit.
- Wife gets even more irritated that husband won’t “snap out of it.”
- Wife feels rejected and becomes cranky.
- Husband and wife argue and it escalates from crankiness to anger and now they both retreat away from one another to stew in rejection and misery.
- Kids are now upset too because Mom and Dad are fighting again.
It doesn’t have to be like this!
Imagine this instead:
- Husband is in a cranky mood.
- Wife asks if he’d like to talk about it.
- Husband says “No thank you, I’d prefer to have some time alone to stew.”
- Wife says “OK my love, take all the time you need.”
- Husband goes and has some alone time.
- Wife goes and plays with the kids.
- An hour later the husband emerges and thanks his wife for allowing him some time and they escalate into a supportive conversation about the days frustrations.
- Kids see a Mom and Dad lovingly supporting one another and feel happy and secure.
Other people are entitled to feel however they want to feel. It is not our job to constantly police moods, feelings, or emotions! And remember this…
Another persons emotions are NOT a reflection of you, your parenting, your relationship, your abilities, or your productivity! Your spouse does NOT love you because of what you provide. They love you because you are you!
What does this topic mean to you? Just hit reply to this email and let me know! I can’t wait to hear your thoughts!
With love, gratitude, and inspiration,
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You are not in your family because they need you to do a job, you are only there because they love you. You are irreplaceable.
DO NOT CONFUSE THESE.
Read it again, and let it hit you. Most people do not truly understand this. So please, let this message hit you! YOU are important and cannot be replaced in your family.
Please share this with someone who needs it, and comment to let me know how this feels to you!
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Experience has made me wise, coaching has shown me how to share that wisdom.
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Love and inspiration,
I was walking down my driveway today and made a point to look for the balance in nature. It wasn’t really there. I saw lopsided trees, oddly shaped rocks, and even the grass is growing patchy in some areas and well in others.
Where the hell is all the “balance?”
Then I thought about my lemon tree. Yes, I am growing a beautiful lemon tree in the house. In order for the tree to grow better, I had to prune it. I cut all the big lush branches off all the way up to the top 1/4 of the tree.
This is so the tree could put more attention to growing a big strong trunk to support all the lemons. It doesn’t look balanced at all, and it’s growing amazingly well!
Lately it seems like everyone is looking for that “work / home life” balance but I’ve discovered something…
Balance is BS!
In today’s video, I am going to share what you can do instead of trying to find balance and it will make your life feel so much better!
Once you’ve had a chance to watch, I’d love to hear what you think! Balance… BS or not? Leave a comment below!
Love and Inspiration,