July 10, 2017 | Posted in Challenges, Communication, Family, General, Happiness, Parenting, Relationships | By

3 different clients made me say these words this week:

“You are NOT the mood police!” 

This is one of the most prevalent challenges in our society today…. we feel the need to correct or fix the feelings of other people because we feel their bad mood is a reflection of us as a person.

Imagine this:

  1. Husband is in a cranky mood.
  2. Wife is irritated by husband’s cranky mood so she tries to make him feel happy.
  3. Husband doesn’t want to feel happy right now. He wants to be left alone to think for a bit.
  4. Wife gets even more irritated that husband won’t “snap out of it.”
  5. Wife feels rejected and becomes cranky.
  6. Husband and wife argue and it escalates from crankiness to anger and now they both retreat away from one another to stew in rejection and misery.
  7. Kids are now upset too because Mom and Dad are fighting again.
The End….. of their relationships if that happens enough!

It doesn’t have to be like this!

Imagine this instead:

  1. Husband is in a cranky mood.
  2. Wife asks if he’d like to talk about it.
  3. Husband says “No thank you, I’d prefer to have some time alone to stew.”
  4. Wife says “OK my love, take all the time you need.”
  5. Husband goes and has some alone time.
  6. Wife goes and plays with the kids.
  7. An hour later the husband emerges and thanks his wife for allowing him some time and they escalate into a supportive conversation about the days frustrations.
  8. Kids see a Mom and Dad lovingly supporting one another and feel happy and secure.
The End.

Other people are entitled to feel however they want to feel. It is not our job to constantly police moods, feelings, or emotions! And remember this…

Another persons emotions are NOT a reflection of you, your parenting, your relationship, your abilities, or your productivity! Your spouse does NOT love you because of what you provide. They love you because you are you! 

What does this topic mean to you? Just hit reply to this email and let me know! I can’t wait to hear your thoughts!

With love, gratitude, and inspiration,

Heather Paris

GUESS WHAT???? Coach training is now OPEN!!! Check it out now… space is limited, jump in now….  BECOME A COACH!!

Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!

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