You can’t fix dead. 13 Reasons Why You’d Better Empower Your Kids.

April 24, 2017 | Posted in Anxiety, Challenges, Communication, Education, Family, General, Honesty, Learning, Moms, Parenting, Personal Development, Relationships, Stress | By

13-reasons-why

If you haven’t heard of the Netflix show “13 Reason Why” and you have children, you should really become familiar.

The long and short of it is this. A teenage girl goes through some pretty horrible experiences, creates 13 cassette tapes addressed to the people that hurt her, leaves the tapes with a friend, then goes home and commits suicide.

Does “13 Reasons Why” glorify suicide? Yes, and no. Let me explain…

If your child is mentally and emotionally strong and resilient, and not easily influenced, then no, it’s not glorifying suicide.

If your child is mentally or emotionally vulnerable, has little or no control over their emotions, and is easily influenced, then yes, absolutely it will glorify suicide to your child who’s watching the show in a raw mental state. 

I personally watched the entire series with my 15 year old daughter Carrie. There were violent scenes including 2 rapes, underage drinking and drugs, horrendous examples of parenting, and countless disappointments that make you want to scream to the screen to save this poor young girl who was already dead in the first episode. They even showed her suicide, and it wasn’t a hint, it was a full gut wrenching, emotionally torturous scene.

Carrie and I cried, we were appalled, we cringed and closed our eyes, and we gasped but most of all…. we talked. 

I don’t think any child, no matter what age, should be allowed to watch this show without parental participation and input. Again, if your teen is struggling… this series will show them how much influence a dead girl has on the world and I know that is NOT what you want your teen focused on if they are in pain.

Let me share with you 13 Reason Why you’d better empower your kids, before they think that suicide is a good option.

  1. It’s your job, responsibility, and obligation to ensure your child’s mental, emotional, social, and physical safety at all times and you can’t do that if you don’t know what they are watching, who they are with, and what they are experiencing.
  2. Your kind words may be the only ones they hear in a day.
  3. Anti-bullying campaigns don’t work. There will always be bully’s and mean people. The best way to protect your child is to teach them to protect themselves! Teach them emotional intelligence and resilience, mental strength, and some physical training wouldn’t hurt either! Self defense classes are a great way to help young people feel more secure!
  4. Make it safe for them to talk to you about anything so you can help them when they struggle. Let them know they will not get in trouble for being honest because their safety is your first priority!
  5. You can’t fix dead.
  6. When they leave the house, they need to know that no matter how bad the day was, they have a safe place to come home to. Safe from fighting, abuse, neglect, and despair… otherwise, they will find another place to spend their time and it only has to be LESS abusive, not healthy.
  7. Kids who are engaged in groups, sports, or activities with people, feel more accepted and connected and less likely to feel desperate.
  8. Kids who know how to care for their own emotional and mental needs are less likely to be discouraged when they are faced with challenges or tough times.
  9. Kids who are discerning are less likely to hang out with people who are involved in risky behavior or with people who won’t have their best interest in mind.
  10. Confident kids will advocate for themselves when they need it.
  11. Kids who understand consequences make better choices.
  12. Kids learn from, copy, and are deeply influenced by TV shows and if you don’t agree with me then explain to me why advertisers pay millions of dollars for one Superbowl commercial!
  13. Suicide doesn’t take pain away, it just gives it to other people.

Listen, this show can be a nightmare or an opportunity. If your child is struggling, don’t let them watch it and take this as a HUGE SCREAMING SIGN to do something to empower your kiddo before it’s too late! Never take your child’s safety for granted.

It is your responsibility to model good emotional and mental health for your children and to communicate with them! You can’t over communicate!

Please please please talk to your kids today. If you need help, reach out!! If you feel like you need to learn some mental and emotional intelligence yourself, join my life coach training course now and get what you need to empower yourself and your family! (Registration closes at the end of this week.)

There is NO substitute for your relationship with your child. They need you even if they say they don’t. They want you to know them, even if they say they don’t. And they love you even if they don’t say it.

Please share this article with anyone who has children. Let’s spread the word and see how many families we can help! Thank you!

Experience has made me wise, coaching has shown me how to share that wisdom.

Your friends already come to your for advice…. add these practical coaching strategies to your toolbox and blow your friends mind with your awesomeness! Become a life coach…. get paid for what you already do, and make a huge impact on your world!

Live Inspired Now Coach Training Course

You can use your experience, combined with the skills you learn to help your children, students, friends, family members, or your community!

Join us today and share your gift with the world! 

Love and inspiration,

Heather Paris

National Suicide Prevention Hotline: open 24/7
Call 1-800-273-8255


Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!

Why you should stop telling your kid you are proud of them!

March 7, 2017 | Posted in Family, General, Kids, Parenting, Self-Esteem | By

17200367_10211747278293290_1003290547_oRecently a client asked me “How can I instill a sense of pride in my kid?”

My answer: “Stop telling them you are proud of them every time they do something!” 

No really. Just stop. Here’s why.

When we over praise, we teach kids that they should be doing things for us, for the validation, and not for their own self satisfaction.

It also teaches them that their worth is equated to what they do, produce, or achieve.

Trade your praise for love and affection and ask your child how they feel about their own performance instead.

The picture shown here is the inside of a card that I sent to our daughter Madison. She is 22 and just got a great job! I am proud of her…. but not because she got a great job.

I am proud of her because she’s my daughter and I love her. 

It may sound like such a small distinction but when your child fails at something, and they will, they will believe they have let you down, and that they are not worthy of your affection or love if you only praise achievements.

I see it every single day and it breaks my heart.

So instead of praising your kiddo all of the time, try this instead.

Ask them: “How do you feel you did?” Then respond to their feelings.

There is definitely a time and place for praising your kiddos! I like to praise them when they do acts of kindness that you wouldn’t normally expect. Like seeing a woman in the grocery store dropping items and running over to help, or offering their own money to someone in need and so on.

Even then, be sure to ask them how those acts made them feel! Allow them to grow a sense of pride in themselves by advocating for their success without over praising. Then, instead of praising, try saying something like “That was beautiful to see, thank you!”

Let me know your thoughts or please do share your story at the bottom of the page!

Experience has made me wise, coaching has shown me how to share that wisdom.

If you are ready to join the mission to raise emotional intelligence and teach others how to as well, please learn more about the Live Inspired Now Coach Training and get your FREE 6 Day Mini Coaching Course:

Live Inspired Now Coach Training Course

You can use your experience, combined with the skills you learn to help your children, students, friends, family members, or your community!

Join us today and share your gift with the world! 

Love and inspiration,

Heather Paris


Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!

HIRE HEATHER TO SPEAK

April 14, 2016 | Posted in General | By

HEATHER PARIS
Motivational Youth Speaker & Best-Selling Author

Students LOVE Heather’s positive message! Teachers and administrators LOVE
Heather’s solutions!

Students need to know they have the power to change their future!

HEATHER’S MESSAGE:

Heather Paris has been called the “teen whisperer” by many parents!

Not only did Heather survive being an awkward teenager who suffered from “oh my Gosh, please don’t notice me” and “wait, why doesn’t anyone notice me,” but she turned those anxiety filled years into a light-hearted, and inspirational talk. Your group of teens will connect, engage, laugh, and appreciate Heather’s family friendly, positive message of empowerment!

Heather is a best selling author, family life coach, and youth speaker, and she shares her message of inspiration all over the world.

Your students will learn about:
• Making Positive Choices
• Handling Peer Pressure
• Healthy Self-Expression
• Overcoming Challenges
• Leadership

Questions, comments, or to book Heather now:
Call us:
1-607-269-7815
Email us: heather@liveinspirednow.com

REVIEWS:

Tina Nilsen-Hodges, Principal New Roots Charter School
“Ms. Paris is deeply compassionate and generous with her time, resources and spirit in service to young people. Her unflagging positive energy and genuine interest in students supported their success, even and especially when events outside of school threatened to derail them. I am deeply appreciative of her contributions to New Roots Charter School in our first two “start up” years, when talents and her commitment to service were invaluable to our schools growth and development.”

Natalie Krone, President NYS Phi Beta Lambda
“Heather was the keynote speaker to the student leadership conference held by the Future Business Leaders of America – Phi Beta Lambda, NYS chapter. I couldn’t have had a better speaker to remind the students to go after their passion. She was funny, down to earth and was easy to get swept away by listening to her stories. She is a true inspiration and genuinely caring individual who shows everyone that she too is human and not perfect. I highly suggest going to see her speak and follow her on social media sites for her words of wisdom. She will help remind you of what’s important in life. Thank you Heather for being so inspiring!!”

Jim Schreck, WNYR Program Director, Morning Host
“The first time I met Heather Paris, I knew I had to get her on the air. The story of how she turned her life around was so inspiring and so relatable to my audience, that I lobbied strongly for a regular appearance. Heather offers both common sense and unconventional strategies designed to lift people from where they are, to where they want to be. And, she does all of this with a positive infectious attitude. As a speaker, she would be an asset to any gathering.”

Laurie Strough-Smith, Life Stylist; Red Inspiring
“Heather’s passion and dedication to today’s youth shines through in everything she says and does, both on stage and in person! She is inspiring, encouraging, and really easy to relate to!”

RR, Age 15
“Mrs. Paris has made me realize that my education is important and I should treat myself with more respect. Even though I have made mistakes in my life, that doesn’t mean that I have to continue to make those same mistakes.”

Dawn Thurmond, Special Education Teacher
“The students loved her and always ask when she is coming back for another visit. Heather’s positive attitude, fun energy, and great stories keep kids engaged, and eager to make better choices!”

 

WORK WITH HEATHER
Questions, comments, or to book Heather now:
Call us:
1-607-269-7815
Email us: heather@liveinspirednow.com


Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!