The solution to EVERY bad marriage put in simple terms….

January 31, 2017 | Posted in Challenges, Change, General, Honesty, Personal Development, Relationships | By

Years ago, when I was in an unhealthy relationship, I was desperate to find a way to fix it, until I could no longer stand it, then I was desperate to find a way out.

I was so consumed with trying to find a way out and I was so focused on how unhappy I was, that I could never really see any options.

Have you ever felt that lost? I remember sitting in my car with my BFF and just balling my eyes and telling her I just wanted things to be different. I wanted to love, or even would have settled for “liking” my spouse again, but I just didn’t. I felt so trapped, like I was doomed to stay in a state of limbo.

One day, while driving in my car, it all became clear to me. It was like the sun shone directly on me and opened up my soul or something!

And in that moment, for a brief time, I wasn’t consumed with misery and despair, so clarity finally had room to flood in.

It was me… I had been preventing my own growth because I had only been focusing on the problem… and not taking any responsibility for my relationship.

Blaming others, feeling bad, and focusing on my own misery, were the very things holding me back from making a change and fixing my own life! All my excuses seemed to fade away and I realized that I had 3 options to choose from:

  • Stay and be miserable.
  • Stay and be happy.
  • Leave. 

Stay and be miserable was what I had been doing and it wasn’t working, so that option was a big fat NO!

Stay and be happy didn’t work either. I’d love to say I was strong enough to “just love” someone who was acting unlovable, but I wasn’t. No matter how much I tried, prayed, meditated, etc… in my heart, I knew that I couldn’t stay. It wasn’t good for me, or for him, and it certainly wasn’t good for the kids.

Leaving was the kindest option and so I left. I felt free. I felt alive again. I felt like I liked myself again. I could breathe. I could remember what made me happy. I could be a better example. I could heal.

I had resisted leaving for a long time because I didn’t know how things would work logistically.

  • How would I make it as a single mom?
  • How would I pay my bills?
  • How would I take care of a big house alone? 

The truth was, all these things worked themselves out. It took time, and it was terrifying. But it all worked out. I handled everything that came my way!

Things always work out for the greater good when we focus on truth instead of fear.

I have no regrets. I’ve made tons of mistakes in the past, but I am deeply grateful for every single one of them because it brought me to this moment to share what I have learned.

I am now living and loving every little bit of my life and if someone had told me that back then, I would’ve  never believed it!

Stop blaming, making excuses, and focusing on the negative. Take a good hard look at your decisions, actions, behaviors, thoughts, words, and choices and see how YOU are the solution to your problems!

You are not the problem, you are the SOLUTION to the problem!

I hope you will look forward in faith and make the decision to challenge yourself to make the changes you need to love your life again!

I know you can handle it, and I look forward to hearing about your success!

Experience has made me wise, coaching has shown me how to share that wisdom.

If you are ready to turn your life around and teach others how to as well, please learn more about the Live Inspired Now Coach Training which is open again for enrollment! Live Inspired Now Coach Training Course

You can use your experience, combined with the skills you learn to give your children an advantage when they go out into the world, you can share what you learn with students, friends, family members, or your community!

Join us and be a gift to the world! 

Love and inspiration,

Heather Paris


Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!

THIS is enough to cause a divorce….

September 20, 2016 | Posted in Anxiety, Challenges, General, Relationships, Stress | By

Seriously!? What the hell else could go wrong this week??? I’m afraid to find out!!!

This week Thad and I had a flat tire on a remote rural road while almost running out of gas.

That night, we got a call at midnight from our son Harry saying his basement was flooded and smelled like something was burning. (The sump pump burned out, and Thad went and fixed it so no worries now!)

The next day, a cabinet fell off the wall in my kitchen! (Did the previous owner seriously have a purple kitchen?)

Then the next day brought a broken pipe from our upstairs bathroom which led to a ceiling collapse in Thad’s office underneath!

REALLY?!?

Life happens, and when it happens to suck… LEAN IN!!

Many relationships fail because people give in to their feelings and forget that a partner is just that… a partner, not a punching bag for hurt feelings!

Lean in when times are tough and find respite in your partner. And BE a place of respite for your partner too!

Don’t let the chaos of life be enough to pull you apart. Here are a few tips to remember when life gets suckish:

  • Create a plan! You can handle things easier if you have some steps to follow.
  • Don’t take your anger or frustrations out on your partner.
  • Focus on the things that are going well!
  • Support, encourage, and love your partner even more than usual.
  • Ease up on some of your regular responsibilities to give yourself time for the new challenge.
  • If you can’t fix it right now, at least make it neat and tidy! (Neat and tidy just feels better.)
  • Get perspective by helping out someone who is going through much worse.
  • Your feelings are valid. Explain them and vent before moving on.
  • Reach out to the friends and family members that can be compassionate and supportive.
  • Celebrate the chaos. That’s right…. have an open house or a small party to celebrate the challenge. It might not make sense to people but won’t it feel better than complaining about it?

Life is not happening TO you. It’s not even happening FOR you. Life is just happening and the best part is that WE get to decide how we respond to it! 

I hope you will choose to lean in with your partner, be grateful for the blessings, and take each challenges one things at a time!

So far, you have a 100% success rate of surviving every single challenge that has ever come your way! You rock!

Please share and leave a comment at:

Love,

Heather

REGISTER NOW… IT’S FREE!!
September 22nd, 5:30 – 7:30pm at NaturTyme
3 Exceptional Talks at the Family Wellness Event that will change your life:

  • Raise your kids GPA! by Special Education Teacher Katie Dennis
  • Get your teenagers engaged in a positive passion! by 15 yr old life coach Carrie Deaville
  • Fix your damaged or dying relationship! presented by Me!

Register, share, and get more info here! Bring a friend too! 


Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!

Keep them safe not comfortable…

September 13, 2016 | Posted in Challenges, Family, General, Kids, Learning, Moms, Parenting, Self-Esteem | By

safenotcomfortable
Lately it seems most of my clients are parents so I thought I would pass along the wisdom I have shared several times this week!

You are responsible for keeping your kids safe, not comfortable!

We all want our kids to be happy and healthy, and we never want them to suffer. But sometimes we mistake “suffering” for discomfort.

Discomfort is appropriate and healthy. Discomfort creates an environment for kids to learn how to self soothe, take responsibility, and discover their own strengths. 

Here are a few tips to creating and allowing an appropriate level of discomfort:

  • Allow your kids to complete their own homework, or projects without your input
  • Don’t always rush out to their school to bring them what they forgot at home
  • Encourage your kids to try new things
  • Assign household responsibilities (aka chores)
  • Instead of giving your opinion, ask them what THEY think
  • Ask for their advice, input, or opinion on family matters (not critical issues)
  • Use natural consequences instead of punishments
  • Use boundaries instead of discipline
  • Stop over praising and start asking them how THEY think they did, look, performed, etc…

Remember when they were toddlers and kept falling down while they were learning to walk? Those falls eventually turned into strength and balance! 

Let’s be honest, raising kids is the hardest thing you will ever do! It was hard to watch them fall as toddlers, and it’s hard to watch them struggle as teenagers, But it’s worth it when you know they are prepared for the tough world that’s full of challenges!

There are easy solutions to most parenting challenges, all you have to do is reach out and ask for help! Another quick tip… if you can, ask for help BEFORE it becomes critical!

If you are in Upstate New York, please check out this FREE event:

3 Exceptional Talks at the Family Wellness Event that will change your life:

  • Raise your kids GPA! by Special Education Teacher Katie Dennis
  • Get your teenagers engaged in a positive passion! by 15 yr old life coach Carrie Deaville
  • Fix your damaged or dying relationship! presented by Me!

September 22nd, 5:30 – 7:30pm at NaturTyme
Register, share, and get more info here! Bring a friend too! 

You already love your kids, but now you can actually like them too! 😉 

Love,

Heather


Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!

HIRE HEATHER TO SPEAK

April 14, 2016 | Posted in General | By

HEATHER PARIS
Motivational Youth Speaker & Best-Selling Author

Students LOVE Heather’s positive message! Teachers and administrators LOVE
Heather’s solutions!

Students need to know they have the power to change their future!

HEATHER’S MESSAGE:

Heather Paris has been called the “teen whisperer” by many parents!

Not only did Heather survive being an awkward teenager who suffered from “oh my Gosh, please don’t notice me” and “wait, why doesn’t anyone notice me,” but she turned those anxiety filled years into a light-hearted, and inspirational talk. Your group of teens will connect, engage, laugh, and appreciate Heather’s family friendly, positive message of empowerment!

Heather is a best selling author, family life coach, and youth speaker, and she shares her message of inspiration all over the world.

Your students will learn about:
• Making Positive Choices
• Handling Peer Pressure
• Healthy Self-Expression
• Overcoming Challenges
• Leadership

Questions, comments, or to book Heather now:
Call us:
1-607-269-7815
Email us: heather@liveinspirednow.com

REVIEWS:

Tina Nilsen-Hodges, Principal New Roots Charter School
“Ms. Paris is deeply compassionate and generous with her time, resources and spirit in service to young people. Her unflagging positive energy and genuine interest in students supported their success, even and especially when events outside of school threatened to derail them. I am deeply appreciative of her contributions to New Roots Charter School in our first two “start up” years, when talents and her commitment to service were invaluable to our schools growth and development.”

Natalie Krone, President NYS Phi Beta Lambda
“Heather was the keynote speaker to the student leadership conference held by the Future Business Leaders of America – Phi Beta Lambda, NYS chapter. I couldn’t have had a better speaker to remind the students to go after their passion. She was funny, down to earth and was easy to get swept away by listening to her stories. She is a true inspiration and genuinely caring individual who shows everyone that she too is human and not perfect. I highly suggest going to see her speak and follow her on social media sites for her words of wisdom. She will help remind you of what’s important in life. Thank you Heather for being so inspiring!!”

Jim Schreck, WNYR Program Director, Morning Host
“The first time I met Heather Paris, I knew I had to get her on the air. The story of how she turned her life around was so inspiring and so relatable to my audience, that I lobbied strongly for a regular appearance. Heather offers both common sense and unconventional strategies designed to lift people from where they are, to where they want to be. And, she does all of this with a positive infectious attitude. As a speaker, she would be an asset to any gathering.”

Laurie Strough-Smith, Life Stylist; Red Inspiring
“Heather’s passion and dedication to today’s youth shines through in everything she says and does, both on stage and in person! She is inspiring, encouraging, and really easy to relate to!”

RR, Age 15
“Mrs. Paris has made me realize that my education is important and I should treat myself with more respect. Even though I have made mistakes in my life, that doesn’t mean that I have to continue to make those same mistakes.”

Dawn Thurmond, Special Education Teacher
“The students loved her and always ask when she is coming back for another visit. Heather’s positive attitude, fun energy, and great stories keep kids engaged, and eager to make better choices!”

 

WORK WITH HEATHER
Questions, comments, or to book Heather now:
Call us:
1-607-269-7815
Email us: heather@liveinspirednow.com


Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!

How to get kids to do better in school!

March 31, 2015 | Posted in Family, Kids, Moms, Parenting, Videos | By

Heather Paris teaches us her tip to getting the kids to perform better in school… and even get on honor roll! One simple phrase can make all the difference! Watch today’s video and learn the secret to unlocking your kids potential!

What do you think? Leave a comment…


Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!