THIS is enough to cause a divorce….

September 20, 2016 | Posted in Anxiety, Challenges, General, Relationships, Stress | By

Seriously!? What the hell else could go wrong this week??? I’m afraid to find out!!!

This week Thad and I had a flat tire on a remote rural road while almost running out of gas.

That night, we got a call at midnight from our son Harry saying his basement was flooded and smelled like something was burning. (The sump pump burned out, and Thad went and fixed it so no worries now!)

The next day, a cabinet fell off the wall in my kitchen! (Did the previous owner seriously have a purple kitchen?)

Then the next day brought a broken pipe from our upstairs bathroom which led to a ceiling collapse in Thad’s office underneath!

REALLY?!?

Life happens, and when it happens to suck… LEAN IN!!

Many relationships fail because people give in to their feelings and forget that a partner is just that… a partner, not a punching bag for hurt feelings!

Lean in when times are tough and find respite in your partner. And BE a place of respite for your partner too!

Don’t let the chaos of life be enough to pull you apart. Here are a few tips to remember when life gets suckish:

  • Create a plan! You can handle things easier if you have some steps to follow.
  • Don’t take your anger or frustrations out on your partner.
  • Focus on the things that are going well!
  • Support, encourage, and love your partner even more than usual.
  • Ease up on some of your regular responsibilities to give yourself time for the new challenge.
  • If you can’t fix it right now, at least make it neat and tidy! (Neat and tidy just feels better.)
  • Get perspective by helping out someone who is going through much worse.
  • Your feelings are valid. Explain them and vent before moving on.
  • Reach out to the friends and family members that can be compassionate and supportive.
  • Celebrate the chaos. That’s right…. have an open house or a small party to celebrate the challenge. It might not make sense to people but won’t it feel better than complaining about it?

Life is not happening TO you. It’s not even happening FOR you. Life is just happening and the best part is that WE get to decide how we respond to it! 

I hope you will choose to lean in with your partner, be grateful for the blessings, and take each challenges one things at a time!

So far, you have a 100% success rate of surviving every single challenge that has ever come your way! You rock!

Please share and leave a comment at:

Love,

Heather

REGISTER NOW… IT’S FREE!!
September 22nd, 5:30 – 7:30pm at NaturTyme
3 Exceptional Talks at the Family Wellness Event that will change your life:

  • Raise your kids GPA! by Special Education Teacher Katie Dennis
  • Get your teenagers engaged in a positive passion! by 15 yr old life coach Carrie Deaville
  • Fix your damaged or dying relationship! presented by Me!

Register, share, and get more info here! Bring a friend too! 


Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!

Keep them safe not comfortable…

September 13, 2016 | Posted in Challenges, Family, General, Kids, Learning, Moms, Parenting, Self-Esteem | By

safenotcomfortable
Lately it seems most of my clients are parents so I thought I would pass along the wisdom I have shared several times this week!

You are responsible for keeping your kids safe, not comfortable!

We all want our kids to be happy and healthy, and we never want them to suffer. But sometimes we mistake “suffering” for discomfort.

Discomfort is appropriate and healthy. Discomfort creates an environment for kids to learn how to self soothe, take responsibility, and discover their own strengths. 

Here are a few tips to creating and allowing an appropriate level of discomfort:

  • Allow your kids to complete their own homework, or projects without your input
  • Don’t always rush out to their school to bring them what they forgot at home
  • Encourage your kids to try new things
  • Assign household responsibilities (aka chores)
  • Instead of giving your opinion, ask them what THEY think
  • Ask for their advice, input, or opinion on family matters (not critical issues)
  • Use natural consequences instead of punishments
  • Use boundaries instead of discipline
  • Stop over praising and start asking them how THEY think they did, look, performed, etc…

Remember when they were toddlers and kept falling down while they were learning to walk? Those falls eventually turned into strength and balance! 

Let’s be honest, raising kids is the hardest thing you will ever do! It was hard to watch them fall as toddlers, and it’s hard to watch them struggle as teenagers, But it’s worth it when you know they are prepared for the tough world that’s full of challenges!

There are easy solutions to most parenting challenges, all you have to do is reach out and ask for help! Another quick tip… if you can, ask for help BEFORE it becomes critical!

If you are in Upstate New York, please check out this FREE event:

3 Exceptional Talks at the Family Wellness Event that will change your life:

  • Raise your kids GPA! by Special Education Teacher Katie Dennis
  • Get your teenagers engaged in a positive passion! by 15 yr old life coach Carrie Deaville
  • Fix your damaged or dying relationship! presented by Me!

September 22nd, 5:30 – 7:30pm at NaturTyme
Register, share, and get more info here! Bring a friend too! 

You already love your kids, but now you can actually like them too! 😉 

Love,

Heather


Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!

How your attitude about death can effect your life….

September 6, 2016 | Posted in Challenges, Change, General, Personal Development | By

67e70775-7628-4f2b-b3c7-209a0e039d75One year ago today, “Carrie,” who was my best friend for 30 years, died. She had cancer.

I don’t know if it’s an “American” thing, or if people everywhere feel this way, but we seem to have a very unrealistic idea of death. We think we have nothing but time and then are almost offended when it comes to an end. Expecting that each of us should live until we have reached an acceptable age for death.

What if we changed our perception of death? What if we accepted that death will come, and decided to live accordingly? What if we just lived each day, as if it were our first and last day of life?

If today was my first day of life, I would look at everything with wonder and amazement. I would be excited and enthusiastic. I would smile, laugh, run, and jump!

If today was my last day of life, I would tell everyone how much I love them. I would hug, kiss, snuggle, and stay as close as possible. I would leave nothing unsaid, nothing undone, and nothing unappreciated.

Life is full of happiness, beauty, love, music, nature, babies, puppies, waterfalls, food, people, technology, fun, colors, entertainment, and…. opportunities!

Opportunities to live and love, not just exist!

Today I choose to be happy, to celebrate life, and to love hard! I will remember fond memories, and spend my day creating new fond memories!

What will you choose for today?

Ask yourself:
-If today was my first day of life, what would I do?
-If today was my last day of life, what would I do?
-Why aren’t I doing these things today?

*Click here to read “Saying Goodbye To A Friend,” my post about Carrie.*

Love,

Heather


Heather Paris inspires people all over the world to create happier lives through talks, workshops, blog posts, and her book, Live Inspired Now; A Field Guide For Happiness. For more information about transforming your relationship, family, or your life, contact Heather today!